Winds of change….
Change. Everyone at one time or another craves change – whether it be a break away, a new job or a new hairstyle – a change is as good as a holiday (or so they say!) When we choose to change something about our lives, we go through various decision-making stages – what type of change, can I afford it, will it be better than now etc. Change however is sometimes thrusted upon us and some of us have many issues with this.
Right now, the winds of change are blowing fiercely around me. Some I have chosen and others are being thrusted upon me – but I am doing my best to accept this as much as possible. One thing I will not accept however, is the darn colour my hairdresser thrusted upon me yesterday.
I am quite proud to say that I am not vain, some days I am anything but vain. But yesterday, after being so excited about the potential for a new hair colour and the lift that this could have brought me, I ended up wanting to tear my hair out. I was quite literally close to tears. What I thought would be a maghony-brown has ended up being copper-red. I am so sad. I look older and three of my work colleagues have all commented that they do not like it – the rest not saying anything at all!! One, who does not speak English very well, said I looked … what is the word….. horrible!
Horrible! Now I forgive him for the lack of thesaurus, but HORRIBLE! I have to agree. I now can sympathise with every woman I have seen cry when seeing their changed style. How I used to mock these women. It is only hair – it will grow back!! I even shaved my head for a change and felt more comfortable with that then the copper-red hair now sitting on my head.
Ordinarily, I would wait the required two months before changing the colour again, but I just cant do it. I have made another appointment to hopefully fix the disaster that is now my hair.
Other reasons that may be making me feel so emotional about my hair are:
1) New MD at our workplace. He has tapped a few people on the head, taken them out of our office along with their furniture, crockery etc and set up a new office. The current CEO has been absent throughout all of this and there has been no direction or leadership whatsoever. We no longer even have a receptionist! Very soon, things are going to change in one way or another for me and my role here – either I will be ousted or be asked to move also.
2) Still not taking my medication properly. Despite my promise to myself, I am still not back in routine since Amsterdam. I am kicking myself. I do not understand why I am so adverse to taking these tablets!!
3) Hubster is on the prowl for a new job. As the main bread-winner, there is an unstated rule that I will go where-ever he has work. Currently he is not happy in his position and has applied for four role. Three of which have all contacted him; two in Australia and one in Thailand. The Australian roles were not suitable, however talks about the role in Thailand have escalated.
4) I have been offered a new role in Dubai. The role is back in Government and in Communications – my two major strengths. It is a salary increase also. I am really keen on the role, but would see my having to commute an hour or so each day.
So yes, the winds of change are blowing – and I am ready for change – but change is not always as good as a holiday….. take for example my hair!!!