The sound of smooth.


Unless you are as crazy into the sound of words like I am, you probably have never considered how words and their opposite meanings make them sound “good” or “bad”. Take for instance that word normal. It is a dull, boring word. Their in no infliction in the word at all. This is quite the opposite for the word “unique.” Saying it requires a lot more effort and there is that kicking “k” at the end.

Today however, I want to focus on the word  “smooth.” The oo in this word makes it sound, well cool. Again, its antithesis “rough” does not sound cool at all.

So, it makes sense I guess, that whenever things are rough, the sounds I make are not so smooth. There is no “ooing” about it. There is a lot of “itting” and “ucking” but no “ooing.”

This morning has been a rough morning. It started at 5:30am. I received a phone call from my father to say that the IVF clinic had made a mistake with the hubster’s medical procedures and would need to reschedule for next week. Ordinarily, this probably wouldn’t be a big deal, but these are extraordinary times. The hubster had boarded the plane for Australia last night. This whole trip was purely based around the bookings we had made, months in advance.

The Problem? Well, with the husbter’s name being Shannon, they had assumed (making an ass out of themselves) that he was a female. They had booked him in with a specialist who only saw female patients for the uro-genital screening and was unable to do the procedure required. Without this procedure, they could not do the MESA either.

Now being a reasonable person, I can understand that small oversights happen from time to time. But, what to them was a small oversight, was a major drama for us. It was too late. Shannon was already on the plane; in mid-air if you will.

What ruffled my feathers was that the person I was speaking to could not get her mind around finding a suitable solution, she was only focussing on the problem. Unfortunately for her, she was the person who was responsible for making the booking in the first place; there was no hand-balling the problem. It stuck purely with her.

Now, you tell me if I sound smooth or cool here. And I quote;

“Paige, based on the bookings you had made, which mind you, I had planned months in advance, my husband is now on a plane to arrive in time for his supposed booking on Thursday. He has taken time off work, we have paid for flights and accommodation has been organised. He is in Perth for two days. In this time, you need to find a solution.

The response? And I quote;

“Please hold.”

Now, in the 20 minutes I was on hold, I am sure Paige was doing some “itting” and “ucking” herself. I do not know exactly what went down, but dear Paige was forced to speak with the Manager who, bless her little cotton socks, was able to reshuffle, reschedule and rebook.

Now, there is a word with a “oo” which I did use a lot in my previous quote which I left out earlier, that word was bloody. So invariably the quote was probably more like this:

Paige, based on the bloody bookings you had made, which mind you, I had bloody planned months in advance, my husband is now on a bloody plane to arrive in bloody time for his bloody supposed booking on Thursday. He has taken bloody time off work, we have bloody paid for flights and bloody accommodation has been organised. He is in Perth for bloody two days. In this time, you bloody well need to find a solution. Bloody Hell.

Smooth? I think not. Probably a bit rough really.

But my blood was boiling. My blood pressure was raising and blood was going to be spilt.

We’re cool though. Everything is fine. Dandy. Just smooth sailing, as always 🙂

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